Two Books About Relationships, Love, and Growing Older

 

"Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young." 

-Henry Ford (as cited in www.vivafifty.com)

Do you agree with Ford? What do you think of his statement about growing older? Although sometimes I feel that my body is never going to "stay young," I do believe that my mind can stay young if I continue to try to learn everything that I can. The funny thing is that I'm interested in way too many topics, especially when it comes to history, countries that I've never visited, and books. I don't learn because I'm trying to impress anyone or because I have to "live up" to some sort of expectation placed on me by society. I do it because it brings me enjoyment - it's that simple. I will always think of myself as a learner, so don't look puzzled when you see me reading all of the "extra" material in a book or when I'm learning Italian for no "good" reason. That's just me.

So, that brings me to one of my favorite subjects, books. I finished two books this week: A Garden in Paris by Stephanie Grace Whitson, and Major Pettigrew's Last Stand by Helen Simonson. Both of these have the themes of growing older, looking back at one's life, and broken relationships. For good measure they both throw in a little romance as well, so if you enjoy that sort of thing, you will like these books. Whitson's book is about a widow who is about fifty years old. She has one grown daughter who has her MBA and a fiance. Mary, the widow, decides to write a letter to her French boyfriend from many years ago and travels to Paris alone before she even gets a response from John Luke. She didn't leave a forwarding address or a return date for her daughter, so she panics and thinks she's gone crazy. Liz, the daughter, goes to Paris with her fiance and reunites with her mother, only to find that her mom is having a great time in Paris with some of her new young friends and John Luke. As it turns out, John Luke hasn't had much luck in relationships because of his life on the sea, so he is "available" and sparks begin to fly once again. But you need to read the book to know the full ending. Liz and Mary do make amends about their troubled relationship as mother/daughter, and Liz realizes for the first time that her mom made many sacrifices in order to be a wife and a mother: she gave up traveling, playing the violin, and doing anything that she really loved. Mary learns that it's never too late to change your life and to move forward.

Major Pettigrew's Last Stand is the second book that I read for the new book club that I'm in. It reminds me a little bit of the Mitford series books, except this book isn't nearly as sugary or "upbeat." But the themes of the joys of simplicity, unconditional love, and family honor resonate throughout the pages. The Major is a retired army officer who lives alone in a small English village, Edgecombe St. Mary. He is a widower and has one grown son, Roger, who lives in London and enjoys the finer things in life, unlike his dad. He is fixated on knowing people who will help his career and get him the money that he wants for all of the nice things that he thinks he needs. His dad, on the other hand, enjoys his small quiet village for what it is, and he begins to fall for a Pakistani widow, a shopkeeper that he often sees at work in her store. They begin a friendship and sparks soon begin to fly, so to speak. In her culture a woman does love live alone and run a business, so her nephew is sent to live with her. He disapproves of his aunt's relationship with the Major for a while, but later on he begins to respect the Major when he sees how kind he is. There are several strained relationships among the characters, and this causes the Major to feel very frustrated and alone. He doesn't get along well with his own son, and many people disapprove of his relationship to Mrs. Ali, the widow. As a Pakistani, she is a minority in the small village, and she has very few friends. Interwoven throughout the story is the Major's desire to own both of the rifles that his father left to he and his brother. After the death of his brother, Bertie, he tried to get the other rifle so that the pair could stay together as they were originally intended to be. It's a sweet story that I think you'll enjoy. It's not a sappy story - there are many flawed characters - but the characters are believable and authentic. The Major finds that although he is older, he still has the desire to have good friendships and even a little bit of romance. He doesn't let anyone "put him out to roost."

This week I plan to begin reading a book by Charles Dickens, Little Dorrit. I'll admit that I've never heard of the book but it sounds interesting so I'm going to give it a try. I also have a book to listen to in the car.

Thank you for reading my blog! Many of you are newer readers, so I thought I'd share my list of books that I've read since 1984. I know I did this in the beginning, but I'd like to start again since I've read more books in the past couple of years. This might jiggle your memory and remind you that you wanted to read a particular book. This time I'll only list five books at a time instead of ten.

Books that I've read since 1984, alphabetically by author:

1. Kinfolks falling off the family tree by Lisa Alther
2. Blue Christmas by Mary Kay Andrews
3. The Bridge on the Drina by Ivo Andric
4. Wouldn't Take Nothing for My Journey Now by Maya Angelou
5. A Woman in Berlin by "Anonymous". This is the memoir of a woman who survived WW II and kept a journal for 4 months during the Russian occupation of Berlin.

Have a great week, and try to stay cool!

-Melissa Hill
Book Blogger
www.onegoodbookblog.blogsppot.com

Here I am in Monroeville, Alabama in the month of June. I learned a lot about Harper Lee and Truman Capote. Lauretta and I had a blast being nerds!

Youth Church Camp, The Nest, and More

"'In her intoxicating first novel, Cynthia D'Aprix Sweeney has written an epic family story that unfolds in a deeply personal way. The Nest is a fast-moving train and Sweeney's writing dares us to keep up. I couldn't stop reading or caring about the juicy and dysfunctional Plumb family.'" 

-Amy Poehler, Author of Yes Please in her review of The Nest 
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 I guess sometimes it pays to ask a famous person to say something positive about the book that you have written. The people who wrote brief reviews of The Nest on the back jacket of the book are Amy Poehler, Elizabeth Gilbert, Jami Attenberg, Bret Anthony Johnston, and Matthew Thomas. All of them are published authors but I don't wholeheartedly agree with what they said. While I do agree with Poehler that The Nest is "a fast-moving train," for me, personally, it was more like a "train wreck." The book is clearly organized in an interesting way as it goes back and forth between characters and their pasts, but most of the characters are so dysfunctional that I just could not enjoy this book. Does a good story have to have curse words, abusers, and dark characters who do whatever they please, no matter how horrific their actions are? I just don't get it. To call this family "dysfunctional" is to put it very mildly because they are much more than that. They are a train wreck, a total mess, a reminder that our communities may be filled with people who think and act like this. I just don't enjoy this kind of subject matter. That's just who I am - an old fuddy-duddy, I guess, and I'd rather read a book about imperfect characters who argue about their inheritance without using filthy language and acting out in immoral ways. But that's just me. I'm going to try out my first book club this week, and The Nest was chosen as our first book for discussion, so I'll report back about what the other people thought. Sure, I can look past my beefs about this book to see the literary value in it, but I just didn't enjoy or appreciate the characters very much. Yes, the book is well-written - it must be or it would not have been a New York Times Bestseller.

Last time I shared about my travel experiences to Alabama and Kentucky. I told you about my visit with my friend in the Birmingham area and the day trips that we took. As you may recall, we went to the home of Helen Keller and the hometown of Harper Lee. I can't remember when I enjoyed something this much, the opportunity to learn about some people whom I regard as heroes. While I knew a lot about Keller and Lee, I learned so much more about them than what I had learned in books and on the internet. So, Lauretta, thank you for taking me to these places so that I could learn more about two incredible people!

June 30-July 4 I was at church youth camp at Ridgecrest Conference Center in the N.C. mountains. We were there for four nights. Our church had ten teenagers and three adult leaders. The teenagers had a wonderful time in all of their activities such as worship, Bible study, meals, ministry sites, and recreation. Some of you may be familiar with this camp, Mission Fuge, or M-Fuge as it is called for short. Was I sleep-deprived? Yes. Were the girls housed in Royal Gorge at the very top of the housing units, causing us to have the furthest to walk to all activities? Yes! But in spite of the challenges that we faced, I enjoyed being in the mountains and having some time to enjoy the breeze, rocking chairs, and the Nibble Nook. Some of you have been to Ridgecrest, so you know how special of a place that it is. 

I've been spending a lot of time getting my daughter's bedroom converted to an "adult" room now that she is married. I've been preparing things for a yard sale, donating items, and organizing the closet. Right now I'm trying to sell the entire bedroom set, so if you know of anyone who is interested in a cream-colored pine bedroom set for a girl, message me on FB. I cleaned out the shed earlier in the summer and had loads of junk hauled off to the junkyard, so it's been apretty produtive time of organizing some of the things around the house.

I hope you're finding a way to get some relief from the extreme heat and humidity that we are all experiencing across the U.S. It's gotten to the point that I dread running errands because I just don't want to get out in the heat. Even Nilla, our 10 year old beagle-mix rescue, does not want to walk very far. She knows it's summer, that's for sure. It seems much hotter here than in the mountains, of course, so I was spoiled. Maybe someday we will live in the mountains or own a small rustic cabin where we can escape the city heat.

Let me know your thoughts on The Nest, Ridgecrest, the heat, or whatever else you want to talk about. I'm definitely listening!

-Melissa Hill
Book Blogger
www.onegoodbookblog.blogspot.com